Industry That Privately Hates Its Software Spends Three Days Applauding the Company That Makes It
Sources close to the event report the networking was incredible, the sessions were transformative, and no one can name a single thing they learned
THE MORTGAGE SCOOP POOP Satire for the Broker Nation | The Broker Journey
Thousands of mortgage professionals descended on Las Vegas last week for Cube Y 26, the annual conference hosted by the maker of the loan origination software that industry insiders have described, in private, as “a clunky dinosaur we’ve all been stuck with for twenty years.”
In public, they gave it a standing ovation.
“This is honestly the best conference in the industry,” said one attendee, posting a photo of himself in a lanyard at a cocktail reception. “The energy in this room is just different.” He did not elaborate on what made the energy different, and no one asked.
Cube Y-26, which takes place annually in Las Vegas for reasons that have nothing to do with the gambling, expense accounts, or the open bars, drew lenders, originators, vendors, consultants, and a category of mortgage professionals best described as “people who are extremely active on LinkedIn.” All of them reported having an incredible time. None of them could explain why.
The conference featured three days of keynote sessions, breakout panels, and product announcements from a software company whose flagship product has been the subject of more private internal chat complaints than any other platform in the industry. Attendees sat in darkened ballrooms and applauded announcements about features that users have been requesting since the Bush administration.
“They announced something really exciting,” said one attendee, scrolling through her phone. “I can’t remember exactly what it was, but the slide looked great and everyone clapped, so.”
LinkedIn, which functions as the official media partner of events no one learned anything at, was flooded within hours of the first session. Posts described Cube Y-26 as “transformative,” “electric,” “a must-attend,” and “exactly what this industry needed right now.” When pressed on what specifically was transformative, electric, or needed, several attendees said the word “networking” and then changed the subject.
The networking, to be fair, was universally described as incredible. Who was networked with and toward what business purpose remains unclear, though sources confirm that several important conversations happened near the shrimp cocktail station on night two.
Cube Y-26’s official agenda included sessions titled things like “The Future of Digital Mortgage Innovation” and “Transforming the Borrower Experience Through Integrated AI Solutions,” which sound like they contain information but technically do not have to. Attendance at the sessions was described as strong, particularly for the ones held before noon, before the pool opened, and before anyone had checked the weather app and made alternate plans.
“I went to two sessions,” said one mortgage professional, speaking on condition of anonymity. “One of them was sponsored by a vendor trying to sell me something. The other one was a panel where everyone agreed that technology is important.”
Industry observers note that Cube Y-26’s staying power is a remarkable feat for a conference built around software that its own users routinely describe in terms typically reserved for a DMV visit. The secret, insiders say, is a combination of market dominance, vendor lock-in, and the fact that Las Vegas is a more compelling destination than the alternative, which is staying home and actually using the software.
“We don’t go because we love the platform,” said one lender who has attended six consecutive years. “We go because everyone goes. And if you’re not there, people wonder why you’re not there. And then you’re not in the photo.”
The photo, a sprawling group shot at a bar posted annually to LinkedIn with the caption “the Y-26 family,” is believed to be the single most important deliverable of the entire conference.
At press time, seventeen mortgage professionals had posted variations of “Already can’t wait for Cube Y-27” despite being unable to name one thing they were looking forward to. The posts received hundreds of likes from people who were also there and also cannot remember what happened.
The software remains clunky.
The shrimp cocktail, sources confirm, was excellent.
The Mortgage Poop is satire. The DM channels are private. The LinkedIn posts, like Wu-Tang, are forever.